Remember that sneaky rooster? The one who hid his boy characteristics until after we processed the last batch of roosters? One day, the sneaky rooster ran into the back of my leg. It didn’t hurt, but it was the first time he tried to show his dominance. A few weeks went by and sure enough, the rooster ran into hubby’s leg. We planned to process him with our ducks but ran out of time that morning. We laughed at how he got out of butchering for a second time. The next week, hubby had to travel out of town for several days. I was happily walking through the barnyard when BAM! Sneaky rooster full on attacked my leg! He hit the back of my leg, then spun around and attacked the front of my leg. This time, he used his spurs and by golly, that eight pound bird caused bruising and definitely scared the bejeebers out of me. Thankfully I had my neoprene boots on. Can you imagine what I did when that bird attacked me? I yelled at him “That is the last time you did that! You stupid bird! You are gonna die!” On and on I went, yelling at him. I called hubby to ask 1)Where are the bullets? 2) How close do I have to be to shoot him? Hubby wasn’t keen on me shooting the rooster because 1) “I’ve never seen you shoot a gun” 2) “If you shoot yourself, no one is with you but the children”. Good points. I still wanted to shoot him, but decided I better not. I finished the chores, never turning my back on the dumb bird because when I did he ran at me. I tried to puff up like a big rooster, flapping my arms and yelling. It worked but it was really slowing down my productivity! Imagining what would happen to one of my children if the bird were to attack them in the face I knew I had to dispatch this bird and that it couldn’t wait. I was very frustrated with my lack of shooting skills/gun knowledge. I should be able to take care of stuff like this, right?
The very next day we were hosting 4H club. I didn’t want the bird to hurt anyone so I asked a friend to shoot the rooster for me. We shall call this friend “Rooster Shooter” or RS for short. RS is very familiar with guns and shooting things. He agreed to come before 4H club to take care of sneaky rooster. When RS arrived, he and two other friends walked down to the barnyard with me. The rooster started running at me again, causing me to scream like a little girl and kick at him. By this point, I was somewhat terrified of the guy. I asked RS to please shoot the rooster in the head and don’t shoot the horses, pigs, hens, steers, or any people. No problem, right? hahahahaha! That sneaky rooster ran around like a chicken with his head cut off. The first shot missed and then the bird was on hyper drive. He ran all over the barnyard before running behind the barn. RS aimed and shot, then shot again. As I and two other friends waited for RS to carry the bird out by his feet, here comes the sneaky rooster running around the barn at full speed! Moments later, RS came around the barn shaking his head. Funniest moment in farming so far. Sorry, RS but it still makes me laugh! RS swore he shot the bird; swore he saw feathers flying. The rooster continued to run at full speed and we didn’t see any blood so we laughed at RS. At this point 4H was getting ready to start so we called off the hunt. I wasn’t going to have time to dress him. I told RS not to worry because the sneaky rooster sleeps in the coop. We will reach in there one morning and grab him and “off with his head”. I was happy that the bird was scared, which allowed our group to enjoy the barnyard without being harassed. The bird stayed to himself the rest of the evening.
The next morning, as I was doing chores, I heard sneaky rooster crow. I turned and do you know what? For the first time in his life, that bird didn’t sleep in the coop. He was on top of the coop! In prime position to swoop down and peck my eyeballs out! I grabbed a stick and waited for his attack, but thankfully he flew down and ran in the opposite direction. “That’s right, buddy! I’ve got friends with guns!” I yelled at him.
Two days later, hubby returned home. He made sure the rooster slept in the coop. Next morning, he was able to grab him by the legs. Then he knocked him in the head with a board. Hubby carried him up to the front yard, hit him in the head again and finally cut his head off. That was that. If you google how to shoot a chicken, you won’t find much, because apparently it isn’t the easiest way to off your chicken, even if you are a sharp shooter. Lesson learned.
As I was plucking the rooster, I discovered RS DID SHOOT THE ROOSTER!!!! The bullet struck him in the neck, just next to his carotid. One more millimeter and it may have done the job. The shot didn’t ruin the meat; it only bruised a piece of the skin. I did apologize for RS for not believing him when he said he shot the sneaky rooster.
I used the rooster to make chicken noodle soup. Yum!